OnFire #313 Not Everything Goes Back

OnFire Encouragement Letter

Onfire #313 Not Everything Goes Back

As I mentioned last time, we have finished our kitchen and we really enjoy it.  Our nook area is particularly enjoyable and all of us eat there at different points in the morning. We like it.

It has been interesting to plan where everything goes back. The kitchen is a different configuration, so everything needed to move. The spices are in a different place, as are most things. Some things are generally in the same area, but everything changed. 

Not only is the kitchen a different configuration; we also decided to store things differently. We wanted to reduce visible clutter, so everything goes into a cabinet, whereas before, we had rice and flour stored in large containers in plain view. It was as it needed to be at one time, but that was then and this is now. We took the opportunity to make the change and we have been very pleased with how clean and bright things look.

As we made these changes, It became apparent that not everything was going to fit back into the kitchen. We had too much stuff to fit into the available space, and so Jan started weeding and thinning – utensils, cookbooks, recipe books, large garbage containers, cookie sheets ,roasters…. It could not all go back, so we had to choose what stayed and what did not.

It was a good opportunity to make some needed changes. Likewise, there are times in our lives when we have an opportunity to pick and choose what will go back. If I may make the suggestion – not everything needs to go back.

While we look at major changes in our lives with something less than enthusiasm and usually just hope to endure long enough to get through them, we should not miss the opportunities they often create. Whether it is moving, changing jobs, depression, a health crisis, change in life stage, or some other disruption, change has a way of forcing us to make decisions about what is really important -- but only if we take advantage of it. We can coast along, accept the status quo, and slip back into old ways of doing things, or we can reorder and reorganize in ways that move us toward new or forgotten goals.

Not everything needs to go back.

How do we know what should go back? This is where I think Jesus’ simple instruction in Matthew 6:33*  is helpful: “But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.”

Jesus tells us that if we make room for the big things, the little things take care of themselves. The biggest, of course, is honouring God first. Here are some of the big things:

-Actions chosen to honour God and put Him first.

-Responsibilities simplified and limited to one’s most effective areas

-Decisions reflecting a sense of calling from God

We learned a lot of lessons from redoing our kitchen. This is one of them – not everything goes back, nor does it need to. I hope this helps. Be on fire.

Troy

OnFire is a letter on faith and character written by Troy Dennis. This letter published Mar 31, 2014. Troy is the Pastor of Next Generations and Connections at Highfield Baptist Church, Moncton NB Canada. *New International Version, 1984. To subscribe or reply, email onfireletter@gmail.com. Blog located at www.onfireletter.blogspot.com

OnFire #312 More Stressful than I Thought

OnFire Encouragement Letter

OnFire #312 More Stressful than I Thought

I wrote a couple weeks ago about our kitchen renovation. It is almost finished. The flooring guy comes Friday, and the parts to install our dishwasher should come any day, so we are almost finished. From start to finish, we have moved a heating pipe into a wall, upgraded our kitchen electrical circuits and moved the stove plug, repaired wall board, fixed damaged ceiling, primed and painted, and installed cabinets, counter, and over-stove microwave.

Our place is slowly getting back to normal. For a while I couldn’t tell if we were living through a renovation, or an episode of “Hoarders.” We had stuff everywhere.

We had help from a friend. It was great that Dan could come and we had a great visit as well.

Something I don’t understand after the whole experience. This was way more stressful than I thought it would be. I don’t even know why it was so stressful. It went along relatively smoothly with few surprises, good help,  etc.  But it was.

I know some of the factors. We only had our friend’s help for just so long. Little things held us up at times, like moving outlets, and that was frustrating.  Our space and routines were disturbed. We could hardly move around the house without stepping over, around, or on something. The tension of making decisions, which I knew would delay the project, but had to be done anyway. On and on.  I suppose if you’ve been through this before, there is no surprise here.  I’ve worked on other people’s renovations before, but this was my own, and it was different. Much more stressful than I thought it would be.

Well, it’s almost over, and most things are put away. Looking back, I see some actions and attitudes which helped, and some others which probably added to the stress. Let me share these things with you, as I think you’ll agree there are broader lessons for the rest of life.

This won’t last forever.

As these things go, it was a short reno;  they can last weeks and months, so I don’t want to whine too much. Even still, I found this thought a source of comfort.  Indeed, most situations don’t last forever. It won’t always be this way is another way to express this thought.

Getting snippy doesn’t help.

Apparently I get more directive under stress, and I forget my please and thank you’s. That’s the kinder version of  what Jan told me, at least. Backing off, waiting to answer, exercising patience – all these things help make stressful situations go a lot better. Its one thing to have stress, but I don’t need to be a carrier.

Pray for God’s peace.

Ironically, on the Sunday before most of the work, I preached from Philippians 4:6 -7 on God’s peace:  

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”*

I found myself reminded about my own words many times during the week, and prayed about my own stress (anxiety).  I would have been much worse without prayer.

Its probably not as big as you think.

Every reno brings problems, issues and decisions, and ours was no exception.  Taken together, they seemed huge. But  one by one, and with a little time to think about them, they were more manageable and less intimidating.  Most problems appear larger than they really are.

It’s time to call in some help.

We originally planned to put down the vinyl floor on our own. I have done some basic floors, and I thought between me and Dan we could figure it out. But when Dan wasn’t so sure, I took another look, and realized it was beyond our abilities.  That’s when we decided we needed an expert.  This was a good decision. There are times when we would do better to admit we don’t know.

There is no going back.

A few times I found myself thinking, “Maybe we could have salvaged the old cabinets.”  That wasn’t realistic. Plus, once we started the demolition, it was impossible to restore the kitchen. The only way to finish successfully was to keep going on. In the mess of things, it is easy to glorify the past, as if going back was an option. God’s best for us is in the future, not behind us.

It will be worth it in the end.

There was no way to install a new kitchen without creating a mess. But it was worth it, and thankfully we understood this from the beginning. It helped. By keeping the goal in mind, it was easier to press on.

These are some thoughts that helped us over the past few weeks. There are certainly more pressing issues in life than our temporary renovation, but perhaps you’ll agree that there are parallels to some of life’s other troubles.

Blessings, and hope this helps. Be on fire.

Troy

OnFire is a letter on faith and character written by Troy Dennis. This letter published Mar 13, 2014. Troy is the Pastor of Next Generations and Connections at Highfield Baptist Church, Moncton NB Canada. *New International Version, 1984. To subscribe or reply, email onfireletter@gmail.com. Blog located at www.onfireletter.blogspot.com

OnFire #309 Cold Hands and Perseverance

OnFire Encouragement Letter
OnFire #309 Cold Hands and Perseverance

Its been that kind of winter that we get once in a bunch of years, and its only early in the winter. On the positive side, we’ve had lots of opportunity to get some exercise outdoors. We returned from our trip to Florida in the middle of a snow storm, and for days I shoveled and ran the snow blower every day. As I write, our friends in Nova Scotia are being pounded by the snow once again. It looks like we’ll get off easy with only 5-10 cm.

Its been cold, too, well into the minus 20's Celsius here in Moncton. The cold brings its own difficulties with staying warm and comfortable, but when you combine the cold and snow, the difficulties multiply. Machinery doesn’t like to work in the cold, and neither do we. On an interesting side note, I put my window down to go through the drive-through yesterday and it wouldn’t go back up. Finally, it started nudging up at about a half inch at a time, every minute or two. It took 25 minutes to put the window back up, but it did go up, thankfully.

We were shoveling snow the other day at the church after the last storm. After a little while my hands were cold and stiff, quite painful really. But there was more snow to move, and some memories of cold hands in the past kicked in. I learned while lobster fishing on Grand Manan that my hands may hurt for a little while, but then it will feel like they’re warming up. It is not comfortable, but it is endurable.

The first time I learned my hands could handle the cold, it was kind of serendipitous, a joyful discovery. The second time I began to see the pattern. After that, I had a strategy. This is a lesson I relearn every winter, and that thought kept me going until we finished clearing the snow.

It reminded me of perseverance in the Christian life. By the power of God, we can handle more than we think we can. And through experience, we learn to handle more.

“... we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.” (Romans 5:3-5*)

As we go through difficulty and hardship, we also experience the strengthening presence of the Holy Spirit, which builds up our character and endurance because we realize we will get through. At some point we feel we just cannot make it, but, through prayer, if we press on just a little while longer we break through. I think this applies to both hardship and temptation. But we cannot give up quickly, as we are sometimes prone to do.

Something else I realized the other day. Sometimes I do things which make the situation worse. My gloves were a poor choice of cold-weather strategy. The pain of the day moved me to try a different set to shovel off my carport last night. Yesterday was actually colder, but my hands were much better and, in fact, did not get cold at all.

As in gloves, so also in life.  It is an uncomfortable thought to realize something I did made the situation worse in the past, but I can learn and change, and I believe this is part of the character development Paul talks about in Romans.

I hope this helps. Stay warm and dry. And stay on fire.

Troy

OnFire is a letter on faith and character written by Troy Dennis. This letter published Jan 3, 2014. Troy is the Pastor of Next Generations and Connections at Highfield Baptist Church, Moncton NB Canada. *New International Version, 1984. To subscribe or reply, email onfireletter@gmail.com. Archives are located at  www.onfireletter.com, but I’m a little behind in updating things. Blog located at www.onfireletter.blogspot.com

OnFire #303 Reflections on Courage

We continue to look at the “Himalayas of the human condition” in Romans 12:9-21. These verses are the high peaks of character transformation.

“Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in love. Honour one another above yourselves.” (9-10)*

Love is more than a feeling. It is active, and looks out for other people. It does all it can to stop evil from coming upon the other person.

One of my great lessons in this happened at a ball game with our youth group in Boston. When we arrived to take our seats at the Green Monster wall, we found that some of our seats were taken. Since there were other seats available just across the aisle, we encouraged the youth to take what seats they could. The game wasn’t a sell-out and so this was not a problem, but our group was not sitting together as we had originally planned.

As the leader, I evaluated things. I was worried about creating a confrontation in a strange city, and while the arrangement was not ideal, it was not bad either. I elected to leave things as they were.
One of my youth leaders, however, a young university student, took it upon herself to gather the tickets from the affected youth. She walked over to the people sitting in our seats, showed them our tickets, and moved them. It was an amazing piece of work. It was brave and just, and I learned a lot that day about taking courage to stand up for others.

“Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in love. Honour one another above yourselves.” (9-10)*

To hate evil and cling to what is good means we need to overcome our own inertia. To do something means we have to change what we were planning to do. Hey, let’s face it, it is usually easier not to get involved. But being devoted to one another is about putting ourselves aside.

We must face our fears for what might happen as we stand against evil intention. It has been said that courage is not the lack of fear, but rather action despite fear. We feared the unknown which a confrontation might bring, but my youth leader took courage anyway.

It takes determination: “I will NOT let this thing happen. I WILL do everything I can.” This is hating evil and clinging to the good.

This is an area where stereotypical markers of courage do not matter. We think of size, strength, age, and position as advantages, but they are not necessary. I have seen some really big guys who lacked moral courage, and some pretty tiny ladies who could make a king cringe. As I write, Nelson Mandela lies in a hospital bed in South Africa. For many years he led people against the forces of apartheid from a prison cell.

Some lessons are hard. I was ashamed of my inaction that day, but what a lesson it was. Better to learn from a mistake than not to learn at all. And perhaps, I hope, I am putting the lesson into practice each day.

I hope this helps. Be on fire. Let us take courage and act, even when we are afraid.
Troy

OnFire is a biweekly letter on faith and character written by Troy Dennis. This letter published June 27, 2013. Troy is the Pastor of Next Generations and Connections at Highfield Baptist Church, Moncton NB Canada. * New International Version. To subscribe or reply, email onfireletter@gmail.com. Archives are located at  www.onfireletter.com. Blog located at www.onfireletter.blogspot.com

OnFire #294 Just Average Part 1

OnFire Encouragement Letter

OnFire #294 Just Average? Part 1

Hi Folks:

This OnFire is in two parts. It’s a little longer than normal but starts with a parable. I got hit with some major insecurities over the Christmas break and had to work through these things. I thought it might help OnFire readers.

Blessings,
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A parable...

There was once a drill sitting on a shelf in a hardware store. He was shiny and new inside his snazzy 4-colour box. He wasn’t fancy, but he wasn’t bargin bin either. He could go forward and backward, and he came with a set of high-speed steel bits in standard sizes. He waited for the day someone would lift him from his place on the shelf and carry him home.

That day finally came when a man entered the store looking for a drill. He was a new homeowner, and he needed a drill to drill a few holes. He didn’t consider himself handy, but he thought it was time to learn, so he headed out to the hardware store that day to find himself a drill.

Our drill was exactly what he was looking for. It drilled holes and it had reverse. He didn’t know if reverse was important, but it sounded good. And just as important, the price was right. Not as expensive as the tools at the other end of the aisle, but much sturdier than ones he had seen at the bargain store.

The drill was excited to be bought by someone so keen and eager. He had been made for drilling holes, and now he was drilling holes. He and his owner drilled holes wherever they were needed - in walls, in boards, even floors and doors. Along the way they discovered that reverse is important, and the drill thought life was just grand.

Until, this is, the homeowner brought home another drill. This drill was similar in that it drilled holes, but it had a heavier motor and a feature called variable speed. It started slow and the more the user pulled the trigger the faster it went. This was important for putting in screws, which the older drill wasn’t really designed for. The homeowner still used the old drill, but not as often as the new one. It was hard not to envy the new drill with its new skills.

Life continued in this way until THAT Christmas when the homeowner opened his presents to find a bright and shiny new cordless drill. It boosted forward and reverse, variable speed, a clip on the side to hold driver bits, and it didn’t a key to tighten the chuck. And, of course, it needed no cord. True, it didn’t have as much power as the other drills. And it didn’t have the same stamina – it always seemed to die in the middle of a job. But, how easy it was to carry the newest drill up the ladder and down the stairs, and around the corner to exactly where it was needed.

Time passed and the homeowner continued to add new tools as he did more things around the house – screw drivers and chisels, and even a few saws. He was especially fond of a specialized tool with mini grinders and tiny bits so small our drill couldn’t even hold them with his large teeth.

Our drill didn’t know how to feel. He knew he had important skills and abilities. He could drill forward and backward, he had plenty of power, and as long as he was plugged in he never ran out of juice. But the other drills seemed faster and fancier. At least he was more portable than the old drill press the owner brought home.

He felt so, so? What was the word? He felt so average. He didn’t like that. He wanted to stand out, to be special. But what if he was just average? Just mentioning the word depressed him. He didn’t want to think it, but what if he really was just average?

It’s not only imaginary drills who feel this way at times. This feeling of “just average” goes kind of like this, that if we’re not notable for some good reason, then we have failed. Its a feeling that, “I’m just an ordinary person. What good am I if I’m really just average? What good can I do if I don’t stand out from the crowd?”

I want to talk about being “just average,” and not only because I try to help people deal with this issue all the time. This year over the Christmas season I got nailed with this thought. I found my soul tugged back and forth as my heart ached with a feeling of insignificance while my head tried to counter with what I know is true. It’s hard to argue with a feeling, I know. Thankfully, however, feelings come and feelings go, and the feeling seems to have passed. But wanting to be true to the spirit of OnFire, I figured if I go through these things others probably do also. So here it is...

At least three things can help us battle this feeling. First, the Bible is filled with examples of how God uses ordinary people. Who was Noah? Abraham? Moses? Ruth? Boaz? David? Mary? Joseph? John, James, Andrew and Simon? No one, really. But God used them in powerful ways.

True, there are some people in the Bible who we might expect to do well. Daniel and his friends were chosen for service because they were the cream of the crop. Saul/ Paul was pretty bright, but was making his mark against Christians.

Many - perhaps most - of the people we see in the Bible were ordinary people. God uses ordinary people.

...To Be Continued... in the next OnFire, we’ll take a look at the final two reasons.

I Hope this helps. Be on fire.

Troy

OnFire is a biweekly letter on faith and character written by Troy Dennis. This letter published Jan 24, 2013. Troy is the Pastor of Family Ministries at Highfield Baptist Church, Moncton NB Canada. Scripture taken from New International Version, 1984. To subscribe or reply, email onfireletter@gmail.com. Archives are located at www.onfireletter.com. Blog located at www.onfireletter.blogspot.com

OnFire #293 Pineapple Surprise

OnFire Encouragement Letter
OnFire #293 Pineapple Surprise

I opened the cupboard door and reached for a new can of cat food. I grabbed it from the shelf we normally keep these things on, the second one from the bottom, below line of sight where we put the more well-used things like soups, but above the things we stoop to pick up, like the potatoes. I wasn’t really paying attention. I grabbed the generic yellow can and then picked the opener from its place in the drawer nearby.

What a surprise to find pineapple inside. Well, it was and it wasn’t. Jan had run out of space on the shelves above and set it there several weeks before. With its bright yellow budget brand wrapper, it could have been anything, and I had almost mistaken it for cat food several times.

I thought it really was a delight to be surprised by the pineapple. Jan and Mark were working in the kitchen when it happened and we shared a laugh over it. If anything, I tend toward the serious and so laughter is good. Jan’s first words were, “Don’t eat it. I’ll make it into something.” She knows me well. I like pineapple and would have seized the opportunity which the now-open can presented.

There are all sorts of lessons in this, I suppose. To pay attention, read carefully, and not assume. Good lessons, but not the ones I saw that day.

Wonder is the word which comes to mind. I love it when little things like this brighten and lift a day. We can’t take them granted. Often these little things are what we needed to click us out of a mood or a funk, and I think are heaven-sent.

Our God is a God of surprise, of wonder and joy. Do a word search in the Bible and discover that wonders happened when God acted to bring about a different result from what was expected by the circumstances. The Israelites did not expect rescue at the Red Sea. David did not always expect to see the light of day when he was chased by his enemies. The people who came to Jesus for healing had exhausted all other avenues of hope. That’s what makes these events wonders. Each person was surprised.

Human nature, I think, is that we forget the Lord is God. He is not like us, not limited as we are, not hindered by weaknesses and faults. We constantly need reminders that He is a God of surprise and wonders, and trust Him to do far more than we can ask or imagine (Eph 3:20).

A can of pineapple is a small thing, but it brought a little joy to a day which had been filled with burdens and worry. A surprise is still a surprise. As we begin this new year, may we all look with new eyes to the God of surprises and wonders.

Ps 40:5 Many, O Lord my God, are the wonders you have done.
The things you planned for us  no one can recount to you;
were I to speak and tell of them, they would be too many to declare.

 OnFire is a biweekly letter on faith and character written by Troy Dennis. This letter published Jan 10, 2013. Troy is the Pastor of Family Ministries at Highfield Baptist Church, Moncton NB Canada. Scripture taken from New International Version, 1984. To subscribe or reply, email onfireletter@gmail.com. Archives are located at  www.onfireletter.com. Blog located at www.onfireletter.blogspot.com

OnFire #271 Who Likes Change?

OnFire Encouragement Letter

OnFire #271 Who Likes Change?

Happy new year to everyone. I hope it will be, anyway – filled with joy, peace and satisfaction regardless of what happens. I don’t normally bother with new year’s resolutions, but I do think about change. I reflect on what changed last year and I wonder what will happen this year. There are always a few things which frustrate me which I hope to change. And, of course, there are always situations over which I have little control, and I hope simply for the strength to hang on for the ride.

Some changes we choose – to lose weight and exercise, pay down debt, do things differently, do something we’ve never done before. These are the changes we initiate because we hope they will make a positive difference in our lives.

And then there are changes we do not choose. These are brought to us, dropped in our laps and we are left to deal with the results. It has been said that the only one who likes change is a baby. Babies know they’ll be warm and dry, but when change affects us we rarely have a guarantee that things will go so well for us. I guess that’s what makes it so hard for us. We’d like to be able to prepare ourselves and take some little comfort in knowing that we have done all we could do, but there is often little we can do.

Isaiah 6 opens in just this kind of state. “In the year that king Uzziah died...” This simple opening sentence tells us more than when this event happened. It tells us something about fear for the future. We enjoy smooth transitions in government, but this was not always the case in the ancient world. While Uzziah was, generally speaking, a good and godly king, there was no predicting what would happen when a new king stepped into power. A new ruler could raise taxes, go to war, and oppress the people. There is a lot of fear and uncertainty tucked into these few words.

The next line is hopeful, thankfully. “...I saw the Lord seated on a throne...” To be seated on the throne was a symbol of power. God was in charge. Despite the uncertainty over a new king, Isaiah had reassurance that God was still in control. No matter who sat on the throne in Jerusalem, God would still sit on his throne, where it really mattered.

This is a good word for us as we face a new year. We will never know all that will face us in the upcoming year, but of this we can be sure. God is still on his throne. There are changes which we will welcome, and some which will be difficult, but God will not step away. He is always faithful. May this be a year when we say, “In the year that ____ happened, I saw the Lord seated on his throne...”

I hope this helps. Be on fire.

Troy

OnFire is a bi-weekly letter on faith and character written by Troy Dennis. Troy is the Pastor of Family Ministries at Highfield Baptist Church, Moncton NB Canada. This letter published Jan 4, 2012. To subscribe or reply, email onfireletter@gmail.com. Archives are located at www.onfireletter.com. Blog located at www.onfireletter.blogspot.com.

OnFire 267 Mini Beetles Cereal

OnFire Encouragement Letter

OnFire #267 Mini Beetles Cereal

What’s worse than finding a worm in your apple? Half a worm.

I thought about this lame old joke as I cleaned out some cereal. It had been in our cupboard for a while, but not finding it stale I dumped it into my bowl. A few moments later, I glanced down and noticed some dark pieces floating in the milk. My first thought was that they were bits of cereal, but a hunch told me I should investigate further. Unless I accidentally picked up a box of “Mini Beetles” instead of our usual variety, there were insects in my food.

It only takes a little bit of something to affect the whole lot. A little salt makes soup tasty. A little catalyst makes epoxy harden. And a few bugs ruin breakfast.

In Matthew 16, Jesus uses the analogy of yeast to convey the idea that a little teaching can completely change us, for better or for worse. In case we need reminding, bakers add yeast to bread dough so that it rises. It doesn’t take much, but once it mixes thoroughly it affects the whole batch.

That was the point, actually. Not long after Jesus fed thousands of people by multiplying the lunches of a couple of boys, the Pharisees and Sadducees challenged Jesus to produce a sign to prove he was legit. We often paint these spiritual teachers as mean ogres, but we must remember that they were very popular and highly respected. These revered religious leaders held a lot of sway among the crowd, including the disciples. Jesus saw this and warned them about the “yeast of the Pharisees and Sadducees.” (16:6)

The disciples thought Jesus was trying to protect them from cheap bread, but he had something else in mind. “You of little faith... do you still not understand?” (16:8-9) In Mark 6 we see the same story from a slightly different perspective: “...Are your hearts hardened? Do you have eyes but fail to see, and ears but fail to hear?” (6:17-18)

The disciples were not firm in their faith about Jesus, and the constant questioning and pressures from the Pharisees and Sadducees produced conflicting thoughts. The disciples ought to be able to see for themselves that Jesus was the real deal, but the doubts and teachings of these popular spiritual leaders were attractive and it was hard to resist the pressure. It was easier, perhaps, to follow the crowd even though it would be a denial of all they had witnessed.

“You of little faith.” These are tough words. No one wants to be seen as small or little. Jesus challenged them to commit. Had they not seen? Had they not heard? In just a little while, Jesus would ask them, “Who do you say I am?” Could they see for themselves that Jesus was the One? (Matt 16:15)

This is an important word for our day and age. Never before have we had such a wide array of views available to us so easily. And, what is more, never have there been so many people questioning who Jesus is. Sorting through all these opinions can be difficult, especially when some of these people are popular speakers and writers.

It is always important to remember what Jesus has done for us. We have the proof of who Jesus is by what he has done in our lives. Has he made us kinder and more compassionate? Has he healed relationships? Has he changed us to make us better people? Do we feel more peace and security? Has he provided in difficult situations? Does he give us hope for the future? These are as much a sign to us as the miracles in Jesus’ day.

There will always be people who doubt, but let us not forget what Jesus has done for us so that our commitment may be strong.

I hope this helps. Be on fire.

Troy

OnFire is a bi-weekly letter on faith and character written by Troy Dennis. Troy is the Pastor of Family Ministries at Highfield Baptist Church, Moncton NB Canada. This letter published Oct 29, 2011. To subscribe or reply, email onfireletter@gmail.com. Archives are located at www.onfireletter.com. Blog located at http://www.onfireletter.blogspot.com/.

OnFire #263 Stacking Stones

OnFire Encouragement Letter

OnFire #263 Stacking Stones

Summer means that OnFire will not be regular as we have vacation Bible school, a youth mission, vacation, and our annual Baptist assembly. I’ll send out as I’m able, but I know it will not be regular over the next few months.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

While on a canoe trip with some friends a few years ago, we came across a rock cairn. We were expecting it because we had read about it in our guidebook, and one of the guys also knew there was a geocache located there. Even still, I was a little surprised to see this pile of stones in the middle of the wilderness. I’ve forgotten the story of why it is there, but a pile of stones like that means something.

Not long ago I was reading in Joshua 4 and came to the passage where the Hebrew people crossed the Jordan. What a great day it was. After wandering in the wilderness for 40 years, they finally went into the Promised Land. And, what a miraculous set of circumstances it was. Just as their fathers and mothers had crossed over the Red Sea on dry land, they crossed the Jordan on dry land when it was at flood stage.

To commemorate the occasion, a man from each tribe picked up a rock from the river bed where the priests carrying the ark of the covenant had stood, and carried it to their camping location that night. The twelve rocks became a lasting marker of what the Lord had done.

As I read this passage, I was struck by the fact that someone had to carry those rocks. 12 men had to lift them from the river bed, hoist them to their shoulders, and carry them to wherever their camp was that night. We’re not talking river pebbles. To make an effective marker out of twelve stones, they would need to be large, as big as the men could carry. 12 marbles would never make someone stop and ask, “What happened here?”

It occurred to me that sometimes God asks us to pick up a big stone and to carry it for a while. Life hands us an additional burden which we must bear for some time.

That thought wasn’t very encouraging when I first had it. I considered that I had enough burden to carry without thinking of more. But thankfully another thought occurred. They only had to carry them from the river to the camp. I’m sure to those men it seemed long enough, perhaps too long depending on the location in the area of at Gilgal. But it was not indefinite or forever.

My problem is that I would like to know “How long?” There are some answers we just don’t have, but these words seemed to suggest that it would not be forever. There would be a time to set the burden down.

It’s not everyday that passages lift off the page, but that was a neat day and I had one more thought. At the end we’d be able to say, “Look what God has done.” In the same way those stones represented God’s power and strength to bring the Hebrews across the Jordan River, there would be something we can point to as a reminder that God was with us.

It’s not enjoyable to pick up a rock, to lift a burden for even a short time. But I drew some comfort that day and I hope it provides some comfort for you.

I hope this helps. Be on fire.

Troy

OnFire is a weekly letter on faith and character written by Troy Dennis. Troy is the Pastor of Family Ministries at Highfield Baptist Church, Moncton NB Canada. This letter published July 5, 2011. To subscribe or reply, email onfireletter@gmail.com. Archives are located at www.onfireletter.com. Blog located at http://www.onfireletter.blogspot.com/.

OnFire #262 Father's Day Talk

OnFire Encouragement Letter

OnFire #262 Father’s Day Talk


OnFire is different this week. I have adapted a talk I gave to the men of our church on Sunday.
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A Few Years Ago...
You will recall that I have two boys, now 17 and 15. Five or six years ago, when the oldest was 10 or 11, I began to feel some unease about raising them. It felt like I was leaving the side of one map but I didn’t have the next map. I was moving into new territory and I wasn’t sure the kinds of things we would face. More to the point, I wasn’t confident about my own ability to lead and parent them.

I tie this feeling to my parents’ s divorce when I was about that age. In these really formative years I didn’t have an active role model in the home about how to be a dad. Thankfully this sense of unease faded and I learned some important things about God and being a father. Understand, this was not a grand revelation, but came as the result of a process over many months. I hope this will help other dads and encourage the rest of men, whether grandparents, uncles, teachers, youth group leaders, friends and neighbours. We can help each other in this important task of raising children.

The Fatherhood of God
During this time I developed a new sense of the Fatherhood of God. John 1:12 began to have more meaning to me:

John 1:12 - Yet to all who received him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God*

I realized once again that I have a perfect Father in Heaven and this eased my worries. Other passages lifted off the page and taught me both about the fatherhood of God and about what being a good father is all about.

Luke 11:11-13
Which of you fathers, if your son asks for a fish, will give him a snake instead? Or if he asks for an egg, will give him a scorpion? If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!

2 Corinthians 1:3ff.
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort,...

Ephesians 1:17
I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better.

These passages and others were comforting, encouraging, and they taught me about what it means to be a good father.

I Found People Who Were Good Examples
I’ve always been a conscientious parent, but it became even more important to me to find people who were good, strong, positive role models. Thankfully I didn’t have to look far. My grandfather and uncle were especially important. After my parents’ separation I spent a lot of weekends and summers with them and they were good examples of men who lived out faith in Jesus Christ. I had these memories to fall back on, and in addition there were friends and other men in our churches I could look to. They provided examples of godliness, character and diligence which helped a lot.

I Paid Attention to What Works
When I find a good example, especially of someone whose children actively live out their faith in Jesus, I pay special attention to the parenting style, attitudes, actions, home life, discipline and correction, and anything else I can get insight into. Likewise, I also pay attention to what doesn’t work. Generally speaking, several things were affirmed to me.

Our faith has to be genuine. Where I saw sincere faith in parents, children were tons more likely to be engaged in faith.

We can’t live a double life. Where I see an attitude of “do as I say and not as I do,” the children tend to disappear from church life at a young age. At about the same time, I was talking to lots of men who grew up in homes where this happened, and they were deeply cynical about religion of any kind. I became very aware that my children were paying attention to what I taught at church, and if I was not the same person at home as I was on the platform, it was a sure recipe for parental disaster.

Character Counts
I am amazed to hear my boys express opinions which sound a lot like me, even when I don’t remember talking about that topic. They are so impressionable. I was reminded during that time that I need continually to work on my own character because my actions, attitudes and words come from deep within me. Character counts and I was reminded to model godly Christian character for my boys.

Apologize and Make Things Right
I became very aware of the times I blew it. Our children see us at our best, and our worst, and they know when we’ve blown it, so there is no sense denying it or covering our tracks. I broke something belonging to Ian out of anger one night. Ironically, it was a stop sign he had made. What a horrible feeling. I apologized after, and we made a new sign together which still hangs on his door.

I learned something about God’s grace during this time. In His grace, we have a chance to redeem a situation by saying “I’m sorry.” Not that it makes it right - of course not. But we have a chance to model how to handle things when we get it wrong. We show by our example how to apologize and make things right. Thank God for redemption.

Time is Love
At about that time, I realized how busy I was, and would probably always be. And, I also noticed how different from each other my two boys were. I needed a way to get them on their own regularly so that I could pay proper attention to them individually.

At that time I started a weekly appointment with them where I take each one out for breakfast on alternating weeks. This is non-negotiable and the only time we don’t go for breakfast is when I’m out of town. On the rare occasion I need to attend a meeting at that time, I reschedule breakfast for another morning that week. I wanted them to know that for those 30 or 45 minutes, they have my undivided attention.

Its interesting - neither boy talks about these times, but both could tell you whose turn it is. These times have become very important for us.

Not Done Yet
I shared these things on Father’s Day, not because I thought I was the model, but because I hoped it would help. Our boys have a long way to go yet, and so this is stil a work in progress. However, if I felt that kind of unease and fear about parenting my children, then others probably do and maybe something that helped me might help others. I also wanted other men to know that they have an important role, even if they do not have children at home. Just as I found encouragement and wisdom by following the example of those around me, they could be an encouragement and example to the rest of the men and to the children in their lives.

I hope this help. Be on fire.
Troy

OnFire is a weekly letter on faith and character written by Troy Dennis. Troy is the Pastor of Family Ministries at Highfield Baptist Church, Moncton NB Canada. This letter published June 21, 2011. *Scripture taken from the New International Version. To subscribe or reply, email onfireletter@gmail.com. Archives are located at www.onfireletter.com. Blog located at http://www.onfireletter.blogspot.com/.